The Secret Jesus

This Jesus is the one that doesn't often make the history books. The one that didn't live so daringly that He is still spoken about generations later. This Jesus is an incredibly deadly Jesus.

He's the kind of Jesus that hides truth, distorts dreams and causes boredom. He's the kind of Jesus who probably gives when His pockets are full, but gets real tight when He's going through a dry spell financially. He's the kind of Jesus who prays when He needs something, rather than ongoingly conversing with the Creator.

He's the kind of Jesus who only hangs out with like-minded, sociable or highly-regarded people. He's the kinda Jesus who sees the negative, casts doubt over situations and doesn't particularly enjoy gladness and joy. He's the kinda guy who might serve begrudgingly - or even worse, He'll serve to gain a platform for himself. He's a man who knows truth but doesn't love those around Him enough to share this wisdom. He's a Jesus who gives in too quickly, lacks commitment and hates the thought of leadership.

He's the kind of Jesus who doesn't speak of truth and would rather see people suffer instead of responding with prayer and love. The kinda guy who sponges off family and avoids responsibility and maturity like the plague. 

Sound anything like the Jesus in the Bible?

Nah, didn't think so either.

It's easy to present the world with this fake and phoney Jesus. If you need a fresh wave of direction, momentum and vision for Him, just stop, look and listen.

Stop living at 100mph and spend some time with Him - you'll realise how magnificent the real Jesus is. Look to how Jesus was around people; His manner, His patience, His love for them. And listen to what He has to say about your situation - He's perfectly placed to speak incredibly accurately into your life at the moment. 

It's no secret that He loves you and He has a very good plan for how He needs to use you today.

This weekend I stood in a room along with men who I very much admire. All of whom have challenged, inspired and sharpened me at some stage and last night it was great to witness them all gathering together and rallying as one.

There are some remarkable characters and some impressive talents within that group. Amazing technical minds, seriously gifted musicians, courageous speakers, loving husbands and bold and peaceful individuals alike. The kinda men you’d want beside you for the long-haul and when the going gets tough.

There weren’t many of us – though there was enough to know that a dramatic difference can be made in our church and within the spheres of influence that we find ourselves in across London.

One key area that was highlighted was the need to continually get alongside each other in support and prayer. Going it alone just doesn’t work. The world throws a million and one ‘gods’ our way to bow down to and most make the mistake of bowing down.

I think sometimes it’s easy for us as Christian men to make excuses - or are presented with excuses that fit: life is always gonna be busy, I'll fit Jesus into the spare time I have - our church is getting bigger, others can take the slack financially - or maybe, my wife is a Christian, so she doesn't need my prayer & leadership - my mates like porn & Jaegerbombs, so I'll enjoy them and let grace forgive me sometime later. 


The examples could go on and on. And if you're going it alone at the moment, you'll allow these excuses and doubts to take root without that loving slap from a friend nearby who can perhaps see your stupid filters on life for what they really are - sin, comfort and pride.


In Daniel 3 we see amazing brotherhood and Godly masculinity in the examples displayed by Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego - three men of God who stood tall together, despite all that the world was throwing at them.


'Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, 'King Nebuchadnezzar, WE do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If WE are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God WE serve is able to deliver US from it, and he will deliver US from your Majesty's hand. But even if he does not, WE want you to know, your Majesty, that WE will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.' (the image of gold today could come in the form of popularity, money, comfort, sex, greed, etc, etc)


These men stood shoulder to shoulder through this - I reckon it might have been a different scenario had they been in it alone.


If you go it alone in your walk with God, you'll allow the world to hack away at your true Godly masculinity and you may not even realise it. Allow the men of your church to get beside you to strengthen and rebuild you through what is guaranteed to be a constant and sustained onslaught from a Devil who really tries to kill, steal and destroy your life.


You won't regret taking this advice, I promise.

Your first love...

I love football. I always have. But to be honest, of late, I only pay it occasional attention. There really are bigger fish to fry.

But today's end of season finale was pretty damn remarkable to say the least. Almost scripted to perfection.

It's pretty cool to see tens of thousands of people erupting jubilantly in unison. Emotions were clearly soaring.  But what I find slightly peculiar was the tears shed by grown men in the crowd, as their team battled through. I'm not hard-hearted and I wouldn't say I was a sissy, but I think I save my tears for slightly more significant moments.

Such emotion towards a sport got me thinking.

What are you MOST passionate about in life?

That might be something that you've never considered before, but just spend a moment weighing up your options. It might indeed be football. It might be a good night out or it might be helping the homeless. It could be absolutely anything really.

But, if you're a Christian, I would argue that your main passion should be Jesus. If your knee-jerk response to that previous question wasn't regarding Him, then I wonder why that is? 

The Gospel was once so compelling and captivating that it caught your attention and changed your life in incredible ways.  What's since diluted that love and focus?

If your team wins 3-0 do you jump for joy and talk about it to whoever will listen? And if somebody comes to know Jesus, gets baptised or even begins to show signs of interest, would you react with similar butterflies in your stomach and excitement in your voice?

My first love is Jesus and being part of what He's building down here.


What's yours, really?

Grace will lead us home

This is such a weird one to write - I can't find the words even though there's a million and one things on my mind. But I'll give it a shot anyway.

Most, if not all, of what I write about is about Jesus. My example, my joy, my Father. This one is about someone else - my example, my joy, my Grandfather.

I've been spending a lot of time recently crying to God, praying to God and thanking God for the life of someone who we are all SO proud to look up to.

When God promises that 'surely I will be with you until the end' - He means it. A long, long time ago, my Grandfather engraved our family crest with the words: 'God is my defender'. Now if you knew what he'd been through in his 20's, on the frontline on the D-Day landings, you'd realise that he really meant that. Subsequent discussions I had with him would support that as well, as he also spoke of daily prayer and reading the Bible to help and guide him through what has been a VERY long life.

He's likely to be remembered most for being a great military leader - a man of true courage and valour. But I don't think these two things are mutually exclusive. God was his defender, in the very tough times and he most certainly is now, in a time of peace and rest.

If I had been in my Grandfather's shoes 66 years ago (when he would have been my age now) I don't think I would have been as brave and faithful. I think my world view would have been mangled and my ideas about God drastically altered or forgotten altogether. Would I have said God was my defender, if I had experienced a life as he did? I'm not so sure I would. 

He does though.

He also said to me a couple of years ago that 'divine help develops the fruits of experience.' Well, he certainly sees the full truth of that now and I couldn't be more thankful for that lifetime of experience and understanding.

As I've been trying to come to terms with his imminent passing, I was lead to Isaiah 51, which has given me amazing comfort: "Listen to me, you who pursue righteousness and who seek the Lord: Look to the rock from which you were cut and to the quarry from which you were hewn... When I called him he was only one man, and I blessed him and made him many. The Lord will surely comfort Zion and will look with compassion on all her ruins; he will make her deserts like Eden, her wastelands like the garden of the Lord. Joy and gladness will be found in her, thanksgiving and the sound of singing.'

As I'm sure Granf would testify, it's always strange how you find bits of the Bible which jump out with significance at particular times when you need them most. This is one of those times for me. Because of his faith and walk with God, this really isn't the end. It's the beginning of Heaven for him; and that changes everything. Knowing that he put his trust in the One who called him, means we can be thankful for his passing, despite the pangs of loss his children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren might be feeling at the moment.

Also, in 2 Corinthians 4 v16-18 it says: 'Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.'

I will always miss him, but thankfully I can always look to the rock from which I was cut and remember that this is only a momentary goodbye.

George Leonard Bream - 1st June 1919 - 7th May 2012. Home safely at last.

Get used to the unexpected

It's been a while since I put anything on here. Not sure why really, as a fair amount has been going on. I started a new job just over a week ago. It brings something of a conclusion to what has been the most bizarre and tough journey I think I've ever been on. 8 months ago, if you told me I was going to go through unemployment, disappointment, confusion and generally being a bit pissed off with God at regular intervals - to then end up back at a job I left over 2 years ago - I'm sure I wouldn't have believed you. But that's pretty much how it panned out - and I wouldn't have changed how it unfolded I don't think (with the incredibly helpful benefit of hindsight!). When God needs to teach you a lesson or two, not only can you be sure that He'll teach it to you until it has been thoroughly learnt, but He'll also take you down avenues you never imagined He would. Sometimes it's like sitting on a rollercoaster, sometimes it's like sitting in traffic for hours. I'm not sure which is more painful. So with MANY prayers prayed, many doors closed, I now find myself sitting back at my old desk, working in a great team for a really innovative company. It feels like it has been a long round trip to get back here, but it's pretty darn clear that this is where He needed me to be. I'm really looking forward to seeing how He uses me in this place.

Just a quick story for you - if you believe in this stuff, it'll encourage you. If you don't already, it should prompt some fairly significant thoughts.

As a Christian, I believe that God still speaks to people today. This morning I believed that I heard Him say to me that a person (wearing green) was in our church meeting, with pain to their left knee. 

I had planned to share this at the end of the meeting, in the hope that that person would respond and we could pray for it.

But He (God) beat me to it. A man approached me and asked for prayer for his left knee! Regardless of what I had been anticipating, you can imagine my surprise! 

I prayed together with the guy. Nothing happened - no significant improvements. So we persisted for a bit longer. 

After a few minutes I suggested that he test the knee by moving it around and generally using it in ways that might have usually been uncomfortable. 

The pain was totally gone. His response was: "It feels weird because I'm used to feeling pain there, and now it's completely gone!"

You might think that God doesn't exist; that miracles don't happen and that there's no way He speaks to people. 

Well... what do you make of this then?? Not only did I picture the scene, but it then happened as I'd seen it and then the man walked away, completely healed. 

He was also wearing a green shirt by the way.

Prophecies realised. Friend betrayed. Soldiers respond. Jesus surrenders. Back whipped. Face punched. Beard torn. Stripped naked. Crowd mock. Leaders sneer. Thorns crowned. Cross carried. Followers cried. Calvary climbed. Extremities nailed. Tree impaled. Criminals surround. Mocking continues. Hours pass. Separation experienced. Lungs empty. Hell endured. Body wrapped. Tomb filled. Tomb sealed. Tomb guarded. Days pass. Stone rolled. Cave empty. Angels revealed. Followers gasp. Guards faint. Death defeated. Life given. Jesus returns. Propehecies fulfilled. 

Army equipped. 

History changed. 

It's Friday. But Sunday is coming.

There are two days in the whole of history which change the course of the story forever. Today is one of them. 

I can't even imagine what it was like to be brutally tortured by a group of professionally trained soldiers. Most people think of Eastertime as Bank holidays, Daffodils, hot cross buns and cute lambs leaping around in fields at the start of Spring. But there was once a day in the midst of all that which didn't look so cute. That day saw a man, who had been tempted and tried all his life by the world, finally get beaten, whipped, kicked, stripped naked and publicly nailed to a tree. That man had never sinned, despite the temptation to and despite the world around him who continued to. 

You're probably thinking one of two things: A) I believe that, thank you God, or B) I think that's nonsense, what do you keep bangin' on about it for!?

For the B people, the reason I keep going on about it is because Jesus actually did die for you and because God actually does love you. Not like a bumper sticker slogan 'He loves you'. But a genuine, life-giving, mind-altering, always-forgiving, gracious love for you. 

Today marks the most significant day of our lives. Some realise it, some do not. Don't let the significance of today pass you by without giving it some thought. The symbol of the cross is the most recognised and often displayed symbol in history and throughout the world today. But it's not just a piece of jewellery or a choice of tattoo. It's where your life changed forever. 

'All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. But after he has suffered, he will see the light of life and be satisfied; by his knowledge my righteous servant will justify many, and he will bear their iniquities. So that whoever will believe in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.' 

(Romans 3v23, Isaiah 53v11, John 3 v16)

Do you ever find yourself caught knee-deep in the trials of this life? Somewhere between a rock and a hard place without any clear path to continue down...

I'd imagine Jesus knows exactly what you're going through. Right about now, 1,982 years ago, He was probably curled up in a Roman holding cell somewhere underneath the streets of Jerusalem, having already received the beating of a lifetime at the hands of some of history's most cruel and effective guards. As He dipped in and out of consciousness, struggling to breathe and remain focussed on His Father, I reckon He probably found Himself up against a trial like no other.

If you ever find yourself limping through a particularly tough situation, don't miss the opportunity to lean upon a Saviour who knows all about incredibly difficult circumstances.

I was encouraged today by reading these words from Psalm 121. I'd imagine that this was a truth that Jesus still would have been sure of, even in the most difficult of moments:

'I lift up my eyes to the mountains - where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip - he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD watches over you — the LORD is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep you from all harm — he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.'

In the hours that followed, Jesus made a choice: to continue resolutely under the will of His Father, despite the knowledge of the crucifixion that awaited Him. It's common to think about Jesus once he was on the cross, but to consider what went through His mind between the first beating and that final nailing, is incredible.

'The Lord WILL watch over your coming and going, both now and forevermore.'

When you're between a rock and a hard place, stay faithful and keep going until the fruit comes - He did.

This is my 250th blog. Fact.

I'm not going to try and pull something out of the bag that attempts to trump anything else I've written on here. I'm not going to waffle on for too long either. I’m just gonna rely on some fairly awesome scripture that somebody gave me today. Having visited a Prayer Clinic at my church (yes – they do exist), a lady read this while she prayed for me:

'Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret — it leads only to evil. For those who are evil will be destroyed, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.'

And then a bit later on...

'The LORD makes firm the steps of the one who delights in him; though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with his hand. I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread. They are always generous and lend freely; their children will be a blessing. Turn from evil and do good; then you will dwell in the land forever. For the LORD loves the just and will not forsake his faithful ones.' (From Psalm 37)



I'll take that kind of prayer any day! I really needed that too :)

He will blow your mind in order to captivate your heart.

More often than not, I like to blog about the stuff that God is speaking to me about throughout the week. Every so often there is a subject too overwhelming or personal to just stick on a website without a second thought.

Not too long ago I wrote something regarding being stuck in the mist whilst climbing a mountain (basically struggling through a long period of praying for a job). I've been hoping for clarity and direction to come and for that 'mist' to clear, so that I can start enjoying some of the amazing views. Well, some of that mist is now clearing I think.

And no,I haven't found a job yet.

Something far more amazing has happened. Towards the end of last year, and already a couple of months into the job hunt, I clearly felt God tell me that He would bless us with a baby before the year was out! That I was to put trust in Him for that and that trusting for work would later follow. It sounds crazy doesn't it!? Why on Earth would I/we want something so monumentally life-changing to come along, when I've barely made more than a penny for 6 months? The world would scream 'YOU'RE CRAZY!!!!'. God would say 'Trust in me, I know what I am doing.'

So with that promise in mind, we did. And then He did. And now we are (so to speak).

It's easy to turn yourself in knots over an issue like finding employment. But then, when God tells you He's going to bless you with new life, and then He begins hand-crafting that life, almost immediately, it's hard to believe that He won't cover our backs with all the provision we'll need along the way.

I've been praying for specific things that I'm looking for in a job; things that I think will bring me happiness. Instead, His focus was to ensure that my baby's heart started beating. That its fingernails began growing OK.

Most people would be freaking out that a baby was on the way, particularly seeing as the Dad is unemployed.

But 14 weeks in, and I'm actually at far more peace about it all than I have been for 6 months.

I never expected the mist to clear in such a way.




It's currently the size of a lemon by the way.

An internationally successful and very wealthy young man drops unconsious infront of tens of thousands of people on a football pitch and one of the main images that the media focus on is the scene minutes after he falls. Players and fans alike, praying. Quite a significant number of them too. 

Why is it that when something such as this happens, a common knee-jerk reaction is to pray to a God who is more commonly ignored 99% of the time? When a desperate situation hits, its not uncommon for usually self-sufficient, self-made individuals to cry out to a God who they normally claim they can live without.

I wonder why this is? 

Charles Spurgeon once stated that 'prayer is the slender nerve that moves the arm of omnipotence.' 

90% of the time this country appear to pay little credence to this; or would at least admit to doing so. But when push comes to shove - when pain, crisis or loss come crashing through the door, we'll flee into the arms of a God who is powerfully present 100% of the time. 

If you think I'm talking rubbish, just wait and see. Hopefully a calamity won't befall you, but God will use any means necessary in order to grab your attention to begin a discussion with you. 

'So let’s do it - full of belief, confident that we’re presentable inside and out. Let’s keep a firm grip on the promises that keep us going. He always keeps his word. Let’s see how inventive we can be in encouraging love and helping out, not avoiding worshiping together as some do but spurring each other on, especially as we see the big Day approaching.' (Hebrew 10)

I've found these verses in Hebrews kinda helpful in the last few days. Faith is a fight, and sometimes having faith comes very naturally to me and other times wading through treacle would be easier. 

It's reassuring and incredibly important to find scripture that reminds us of God's unwavering faithfullness to us - it's a medicine that's hard to swallow sometimes but it's total truth nonetheless. So when the author of Hebrews writes: He always keeps to his word; we can be confident that even if we're in 'treacle' moments, He is always going to do what He first promised. Always. Regardless of how long the timescale seems to be and despite the thick fog which clouds our view of the situation (no matter what it might be). 

So I've found in the last couple of weeks that keeping focussed on that big day is tough but very important - digging my heels in deeper to that foundation, serving when I can't be bothered to, holding both hands firmly around scripture and praying when all I would rather do is sleep. I don't think it's some kind of religious ticklist way of thinking - it's keeping my unblinking eyes set on a prize, even when my eyes are stinging like mad. 

Have confidence that the one who said He'll do it, WILL do it - He's totally dependable. (1 Thessalonians 5 v24)

So, yesterday evening a large group of us congregated in a very old church building. The building has recently been given to us by the existing members who recognised that the time was right for a new group to begin a work based there. 

Despite the fact that it's very early days at the moment, it was so exciting to witness different Christians gathering as this adventure launches. 

Without God in the midst, it won't go anywhere - that's almost guaranteed. Without vision, prayers, leadership, finances and people - it won't go far. But last night more people gathered in that 300 year old building than has been seen there for a while, and looking around and listening to the prayers built on such faith, it's hard to not believe that this might just work!! 

With a well established sister-church nearby and mission fields like a night club literally 10 metres from the front door, I'm walking with a spring in my step this morning as I get lost daydreaming of what the community could one day look like. 

What an exciting adventure it most certainly will be.

Most weeks, something happens in church which totally bucks the trend in culture. Groups of people from vastly different backgrounds come together and sing songs and listen to a talk on a Sunday morning. To the regular Joe Bloggs on the high street, that is an odd way to spend a perfectly good Sunday morning. There are many things that Christians do which probably raise eyebrows, but every so often, real radical behaviour breaks out. It's totally counter-intuitive and shows just how relentlessly the Kingdom of God pursues and changes lives.

I've been to many weddings - most are lavish, expensive and the result of much planning.

Today's wedding wasn't.

Though this afternoon's events have been in Heaven's pipeline for an incredibly long time. God's been orchestrating something significant in the life of one family and recently the scale and impact of these plans became slightly more evident. Some of the family have become Christians for the first time, some have come back to God, some were baptised recently, and today God continued to breath truth and purpose over the family as they stood before their friends, family and two teenage children to become husband and wife - showing obedience to God's word and bringing togetherness and submission to God's marriage and family ethics.

So, it wasn't a hugely glamorous setting in front of hundreds of dolled-up guests. After the church meeting a small crowd gathered as they said their vows and made 18 years of being together official in front of God. No traditions in sight; no dress, cake, bouquet or first dance. But as they said their 'I do's' and their 16-year old son handed them the rings, I can safely say that I have never been to a wedding that was more celebrated in Heaven than this one. It's taken some time for God to move the pieces around the board, but when He does, it's impact is felt and is totally amazing.

I love being part of a community of Jesus-hungry men and women who are willing to pursue Him with such obedience and love.